Wednesday, 20 May 2009

  • Marisol's sleep over the past year

    I just posted to the ExtendedNursing yahoo group that I belong to and realized that it summed up Marisol's sleep for the past year! I wanted to keep it... it is long and useful for me to look back. It really affirms for me our parenting style/decisions that we have made. It has been hard for me to see how things progress when you follow attachment parenting because I don't know many (any??) people in real life that do things this way. So it feels SO GREAT to see things really working out!! Marisol IS learing to go to sleep without nursing! WOW WOW!!

    Here is my post:

    This thread has been so interesting/useful to me! I have been dealing with this for almost a year now! I thought I would add my experience because it has really been good for me/affirming to read other people's.

    My dd will be 3 yo July 2nd. She started skipping nap on some days when she was around 2 yo (almost a year ago!) From about 2-2 1/2 if she skipped nap she could go to sleep VERY early and "make it" through the night. She could fall asleep before 6 pm and not wake up before morning (7-9 am). But her sleep was never that great when she skipped nap -- she woke up a LOT, and nursed more often. So she "made it" but I often felt like her and I were less rested even though we were in bed for longer stretches.

    After the holidays we started actively trying to skip nap. For a couple of weeks it seemed to be going well -- she could skip nap about 4-5 times per week, which meant that every 2-4 days she needed to catch up. This gave us a decent bedtime - between 7-8 pm. Before this she was napping from about 3-5 pm and staying up till midnight.

    The past few months we have struggled. It is still REALLY hard for her to NOT take a nap. And if we try to get her to skip strange things have happened -- she will fall asleep between 4-7 pm and that will be her nap! Which means mommy will be up with her till 1, 2 or even 3 am! We have also had her fall asleep too early only to have her wake up in the middle of the night for an hour or more (one night we were awake from abour 3-7 am! Then we slept in till 11 am). None of this would be too bad except I am pregnant and I babysit, so sometimes I am not able to sleep in with her.

    The past few weeks we have finally settled into the best pattern we have had in months. We all seem to do really well if she gets a short power nap in the afternoon. A 20-35 minute nap between the hours of 2 and 5 pm keep her in a good mood and she will fall asleep at midnight at the latest. These naps are usually in the car or stroller so she falls asleep without nursing. Believe it or not I can deal with midnight! Plus she is finally doing an 8 hour stretch consistently without waking or nursing! And for the first time ever she has gone 2 nights in a row of falling asleep without nursing -- one night while I read her a story, and another while watching a show. I had a hard time imagining before how this could happen naturally but it seems to be happening now! She sleeps like a rock and we get a decent night's sleep. This couldn't be happening at a better time since baby #2 is due in a little more than 2 months.

    Sorry this is long, but it is something that we have struggled with over the past year. I think with breastfeeding/attachment parenting/cosleeping etc. answers are not always clear cut and I KNOW it has helped me so much to hear about others with kids that need less sleep and stay up late -- most of my friends in real life think we are crazy! Also now that I am seeing the "light at the end of the tunnel" I am so happy that we have followed her lead and have done what feels natural even though it wasn't always easy. She is really weaning on her own schedule and learning to sleep when she feels like she needs it.

    To sum up -- I think that it is definitely a process like others have said and not something that happens all at once. Pluse growth spurts, weather, sickness all affect whether a kids CAN "make it" without a nap. It seems to change -- so one week they seem fine without a nap, and the next they just can't do it! It also takes time to figure out what works best for everyone in your family, a lot of trial and error, and willingness to try different things (like taking a drive when you know they are sleepy!)

    Hope this is helpful to someone!

    Susan 

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